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ChenrukNote

Goddess
My mom said that in Thailand when she went to school they taught her how to say pencil and the master told repeat after me: "this is a penciew" hahaha!
 

SethT

anie's bb [c] D=
ok this one is about my mum. not as such a fob story but my mum so freakin clumsy.

okay well this happen in a shopping mall toilet (lmao yes)...well she was in the toilet and all of a sudden she look down and saw the person next door foot look somewhat like a man's. out of her curiosity and bend down and started looking over to see if the person next door to if the person was a lady or a man. unfortunately for my mum, she had long hair and so when she bent down (this is while still on the toilet seat lol) her long hair dropped to the ground too. the person next door saw her hair so she quickly came outside from the toilet. so mum was all embarrass and she stayed in the toilet for like 3 mins for that person to leave...but she didnt, she was still outside waiting for my mum to come out...and yeah, guess what - it was a lady and she started telling my mum off....lmao :loool:

when she told me that story i was like wth mum, why the hell did you look over for :loool:
 

SethT

anie's bb [c] D=
and woah, ladyofdarkness...your story is freaky *shievers*...i would totally freak out if that happened to me.
 
McDonald's reminds me of a story at the drive-thru. Not really FOB but it was pretty funny.

So my sister wanted to get something to eat and I had to ride with her since she picked me up from school. We're waiting in the drive-thru and the car in front of us is taking forever. My sister was so mad it wasn't funny. We could hear the dude in the car yelling and he obviously had a Spanish accent. He sounded just as angry and I think he was even cursing in Spanish. So my sister wonders what could be taking so long and she pulls up closer to find out he's shouting into a trash can instead of the intercom. We all fell back into our seats laughing.

man this reminds me of me once at wendy's the intercom thing was not working and there's no paper and i was just yelling at it...lol
 

lady0fdarkness

Professional Lakorn Watcher
My dad has a friend who works at the construction site. He's a middle aged Lao man. So anyway, his wife always make him lunch to bring to work everyday. She loves to make him all the good dishes.

Everyday at work, when it's lunch time, all the white men would flock to him, asking him to taste this and that, and they eventually was hooked on his food. Everyday they'd come to him during lunch and literally ate half of his lunch. And the Lao man always tried to be polite and didn't say a word to them. So one day he decided to do something drastic in order to stop them from eating his food all the time, cause he'd be hungry all day.

One day he told his wife that he'll make his own lunch. So the man took two slices of bread, and took the a tub of shrimp paste (Kapee) and spread that sucker all around the bread.

Well.. during lunch, there comes the white man wanting his food again..

White man - What's for lunch today?
Lao man - Laotian sandwich
White - Can I try some?
Lao man - Sure

The white guy smelled the sandwich and noticed the aroma of the paste, but brushed it off and eagered to try this intriguing lao sandwich. He bit into it and made a nasty looking face. He handed the sandwich back to the lao man and cried for water to wash the salty textured paste from his mouth. Haha.. from that day on, the white man took a clue and rarely bothers the lao man for his food anymore.
 

sueliq

sarNie Hatchling
haha.. thats a funny story..

i got one.. i was at a vietnamese restaurant with my cousin, buying iced coffee. There was a special: buy 3 get one free. So we bought three and got one. then all of a sudden the cashier says "Eightthen".. i was like eighteen dollars *

She says " yeah"
and i'm doing the math in my head., one coffee is like 2 dollars, how can it be that much

she gave me an attitude and said "TAX!!!"

and i was like "Yeah, not that much"

so we were arguing for awhile until one of the other cashier looked at the register as said:

"its $ 8.10" :lmao:
 

ChenrukNote

Goddess
LMFAO at your story suelig. It reminds me of eating at a chinese restaurant and the waitress asked if i wanted some lice and I'm thinking hell no I don't want any lice. Turns out she was saying "rice" :lol:!
 

sueliq

sarNie Hatchling
yeah.. i hear that a lot "lice"or >> my favorite "fly lice".. hehehehe

i mean it is such a bad thing to be making fun of other ppl, but you just can't help ur self when you actually hear it.
 

sueliq

sarNie Hatchling
lmao. :lol: seriously. my mom espcially have trouble with names.
isn't that the truth.. relatives are so funny!!!

There was a white man at the supermarket that looked my mom up and down, and out of nowhere he goes, you're so ugly... go back to your country! And my Mom didn't speak english that well and she tried to curse the guy,, she goes... ass-a-hole.. your face look like my pusshy!! Which she meant to say you "asshole and you have pussy face!" :D LOL,, sorry to be so vulgar.
I have a similar story involving my dad..
this was way back in the '80s, and my parents just came to the states

well he was walking down the street and collecting cans, when this black guy comes and said he wanted to help my dad find the nearest recycling center.

my dad said no.. he don't need help.. then all of a sudden the black guy grabs my dad's sack of cans and runs off into a building..

so my dad starts running after him.. he can't catch up so he starts cussing " ah dog, ah shit" then my dad threatens him by saying " cambodian kill" and gesturing a throat being slit.. <<funny $h!t
 

fun

Expired Sarnie
this is a story of my white math teacher. okay i was not there but it was the talk in town at our school at the time. they went to visit a university and he went to use the bathroom. he was confused why there wasn't any stall, you know for men. anyways he was observing the bathroom and somehow he thought why is it so clean. he went to the largest stall, the handicap, he was like wow, they even have handle it would be great to shit. [he is a very funny teacher!] and so when he got out that was when he noticed it was not the men's room. the funny thing was he didnt zip his zipper right away and one of my friend was there in the bathroom shocked. i almost died from laughing. and so he covered his face with his hand and ran out. in the bus everyone was talking about it, gee how news spread so fast. i wonder if he even washed his hand before going out. :loool:
 

Muddie Murda

smile...
Oh mannn great stories! I skipped the one with the creepy story for now cuz I'm alone...lol

Anyways Here's some..................

My friend was going on a field trip for school and the kids had to either pack their own lunch or get it from cafeteria. So my friend decided to pack instead and told her mom to pack it for her. Next morning she wakes up and her mom packed her a boiled whole fresh killed chicken with rice. Haha She didn't take it to school of course. Poor girl

----

A few years back when my grandma was with us, she had a nurse come and give my grandma shots. The nurse brings her kids with her sometimes too. At that time my baby bro was still a baby and was in diapers. He dirtied his diaper And my MOM said LOUDLY (She talks loud -_-) "Ohhh you SHIT!" (Not calling him shit...lol) And my siblings and I turned away and covered our faces and the nurse's kids were like O_O. My mom doesn't know that cuss words are...cust words.

I have more but I can't think anymore :(

Where ARE all the fob stories??
 

Kenshin

sarNie Egg
Mmm...well here's my lame collection.

I was at Wal-Mart with a Mexican friend and this other Mexican guy comes up to me and asks me something in Spanish (because I just look Mexican and my friend doesn't <_< ) and I say back in English, "I'm sorry I don't speak Spanish". He looks really mad and shouts something in Spanish and storms off. My Mexican friend to the side can't hold in his laughter and bursts out laughing. I ask him what he just said and he told me "What the -beep- is the point of being that tan if you can't speak Spanish?" :huh:

---

I just realized my mom says "uh-oh" at the most wrong times ever.

"I'm turning 39 tomorrow". "Uh-oh!"
"You are so good with those chopsticks. You have to teach me sometime." "Uh-oh!"
"Your son is so much bigger than you. How do you handle that?" "Uh-oh!"
"Excuse me ma'am. Do you know where the bathroom is?" "Uh-oh!"

And I witnessed these firsthand because I was with her when these happened.

---

My friend is going to Laos for the summer. We'll call him B. I'm D. Friends are A and N. Guy is G. Dialog is pretty explicit. Be warned.

B: Yeah man. I'm going to Laos. When ya'll see me and be like "What's up Byron?" I'll be like "Sabaidee!"
D/A/N: (Laugh loud)
Guy walks by and overheard the Sabaidee and says: You're selling weed?!
Everyone looks at him like he's crazy.
A: Umm...no.
G: Don't lie. I heard him say he's selling weed. He just shouted "Selling weed"
D: Umm...he said "Sabaidee" which is how you say "Hello" in Laos.
G: -beep- don't lie to me you stupid -beep-. I know weed when I hear it.
N: Nah nah you got it wrong man. See. We're Asian. You know, Chinese, Japanese. Yeah. He said something in Asian.
G: Yeah -beep-
B: Hey man. Just chill.
G: Yeah, I got better -beep- to do than sit here and argue with a bunch of dog-eaters.
That little comment pissed us all off, but we held back, except for N.
N: Hey man, it ain't our fault your white-ass ears can't hear anything past cop sirens and "Sorry sir you are HIV positive".
G: -beep- you dog-eaters.
N: Yeah well I think you the one who be nibbling on dogs.
G: How you figure that -beep-
N: You know what they say. You are what you eat. If it smells like a b--ch, acts like a b--ch, and walks like a b--ch, its probably a b--ch.
At which point he left still cursing at us.
 

lady0fdarkness

Professional Lakorn Watcher
When I moved to Florida 13 years ago from Hawaii, I was pretty much foreign to Spanish words and pronounciations, cause we didn't have much spanish people in Hawaii.

Anyway, my first job in Florida was telemarketing...

When the screen on the monitor popped up, and the dialer dialed a spanish household... I began my script..

Hello, may I speak to Jesus?

The woman go.. "Hey-soos?"

Then I go, no... Jesus! Is Jesus home??

After hearing me talk on the phone, my co-workers then explained to me that it was promounce "Hey-soos" not Jesus. Haha..
 

ohitsnoyyy

Mama Noy ♥️
When I moved to Florida 13 years ago from Hawaii, I was pretty much foreign to Spanish words and pronounciations, cause we didn't have much spanish people in Hawaii.

Anyway, my first job in Florida was telemarketing...

When the screen on the monitor popped up, and the dialer dialed a spanish household... I began my script..

Hello, may I speak to Jesus?

The woman go.. "Hey-soos?"

Then I go, no... Jesus! Is Jesus home??

After hearing me talk on the phone, my co-workers then explained to me that it was promounce "Hey-soos" not Jesus. Haha..
lmao. speaking of spanish. my mama doesn't know how to say 'thank you very much' in spanish.

she says it like this: "ga-la-cee-us mah-nu-cho' [muchos garcias] :loool:
 

lady0fdarkness

Professional Lakorn Watcher
A neighbor or some folks gave my family a whole box of yogurt, and being the FOB that we were, we ended up throwing the whole thing away cause we thought it was spoiled Icecream.
 
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