justice or reputation????

[sunflower]

i live in minnesota.. and i know of 2 hmong girls whose been raped, not close friends but girls that i went to school with... i was told by my friend that they were raped after taking drugs, too... the two girls were 14 and 16 years of age.. i found out after they had told their school counselors or something... i think those two girls dropped out and never returned to school... i don't see them around anymore... hopefully their families didn't force them to marry the person that raped them.. that would be aweful!

aniwaise.. after reading the stories that anti-hmong posted i am shocked by how many times this happens! it's aweful... i'm not going to say that those girls 'deserve it' but those girls did make themselves vulnerable to the rapist... for example.. the girls that went a few blocks from their house to go get ice cream... if she didn't get into the car, no matter how her friend told her and begged her, she wouldn't of had been raped. if only she had walked home on the street where the public can see and if they tried to force her she could scream and people would hear her.. she wouldn't end up in that basement.

and the first case of the 12 year old girl. what the heck is a 12 year old girl doing at a late night party with a bunch of drinking and drug taking adults? that just ticked me off... at first i thought she was at some sleep over party with her other 12 year olds at a supervised house or something.. but she jumped into a car full of many male gang members! what the heck? what was she thinking? that they were gonna take her to some ice cream shop and than take her home?

overall, no matter how vulnerable these girls were.. those idiots had no right to take advantage, rape and prostitute a 12 or 16 year old girl or any girl or woman no matter what age they are at! they deserve to burn in hell... and i'm sure that these kinda things happen in every culture and area, but it just happens in this area more than any other area and mostly to young hmong girls. so i get why anti-hmong is only focusing in one area and only on hmong... since this is a hmong topic, she was only talking about hmong girls... so don't jump to conclude that anti-hmong was saying that it only happens to hmong girls.....

i am not hmong... so i am not familiar with the culture but all these girls seem to say one thing... they are embarrassed and fear that they will be rejected from their society.. i guess running away and going to parties is on a different embarrasment or disrespectful level to the family than being sexually assaulted. and most of them feared of having to be forced into an arranged marriage most likely with one of her rapist... imagine how gruesome that would be... marrying a person who raped you when you were only 12 or 15 years old... in my mind right now... reading all these stories.. i think i would rather be killed or kill those bastards myself... it wouldn't do me any justice to force them to marry me when i am more than 99% sure that they would physically and emotionally abuse me in the future and more than likely they may do this to other girls, regardless if i marry them or not... (that's just the kinda person that i am.. so don't take my opinion to heart) ...

i think woman in general should get over this whole perfect image thing... the world is not perfect, and NO ONE is perfect... so if something bad happens to you, by all means report it! if you don't they will think that all woman are like this and keep on going without thinking that it's wrong... or maybe they know that it's wrong but think that woman are just too scared or weak and won't report it... or can't do anything to them just because of the culture... well guess what? this is AMERICA! here, if a girl is sexually assaulted before the age of 18.. that bastard is gonna be put in jail! and even if you are over the age of 18, and you were raped or sexually insulted you can put those bastards in jail! so forget what cultures you are from and the rules that hold you back from getting justice and tell your school teachers or counselors... or call the cops and put those idiotic bastards in jail!

 

[tarnwatcharin]

What the heck are you talking about SUNFLOWER? That's the kind of attitude that reporter of this article is talking about.

No matter what people do or whatever situation they may be in. Its NO EXCUSE FOR GETTING GANG RAPED!

You are again blaming the victim as if what they have gone thru is not bad enough! HAVING A BEER BOTTLE JAMMED UP HER PRIVATE PARTS!

THOSE WHO ARE BLAMING THE VICTIM MAKE ME SICK!

Its just like saying if you dressed slutty you deserved to be raped!

THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR RAPE no matter what anyone was doing, saying or acting! :angry:

 

[ceda_lee]

What the heck are you talking about SUNFLOWER? That's the kind of attitude that reporter of this article is talking about.

No matter what people do or whatever situation they may be in. Its NO EXCUSE FOR GETTING GANG RAPED!

You are again blaming the victim as if what they have gone thru is not bad enough! HAVING A BEER BOTTLE JAMMED UP HER PRIVATE PARTS!

THOSE WHO ARE BLAMING THE VICTIM MAKE ME SICK!

Its just like saying if you dressed slutty you deserved to be raped!

THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR RAPE no matter what anyone was doing, saying or acting! :angry:

[post="34875"][/post]​

You know what? You're right!!! There is no excuse for rape!!!

 

[sunflower]

What the heck are you talking about SUNFLOWER?  That's the kind of attitude that reporter of this article is talking about. 

No matter what people do or whatever situation they may be in.  Its NO EXCUSE FOR GETTING GANG RAPED!

You are again blaming the victim as if what they have gone thru is not bad enough!  HAVING A BEER BOTTLE JAMMED UP HER PRIVATE PARTS!

THOSE WHO ARE BLAMING THE VICTIM MAKE ME SICK!

Its just like saying if you dressed slutty you deserved to be raped! 

THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR RAPE no matter what anyone was doing, saying or acting!  :angry:

[post="34875"][/post]​

ummmmm... maybe you might want to read my post again... because i think you only read the first or second paragraph... i clearly said that they(the rapists) deserve to burn in hell! i was only summarizing and giving my input on what the girls should or shouldn't of had done... but than when you get into the fourth paragraph i clearly stated that those people have no right to take advantage... please read my opinion/post clearly and understand before you start to blame me for blaming the victims... <_<

 

[tarnwatcharin]

No, I read your post in its entirety and then just now once again and I still have the same impression that your are very bias towards the girls.

I have no bias towards you or anyone else in this forum, I just think maybe you should state it more clearly because if I interpreted this way I'm sure others may too and its a bad thing for girls to read and feel if they know of someone or even themselves who have been raped. They'll think even the whole world not just their community is blaming them.

 

[rainie_vang]

i don't know what to say at all... i mean, there are possible things to this story...

 

[FrozenPearl]

These people deserved!!! I felt bad for them, but they deserved what they trying to be......If you are at that younger age why trying to wanna be and be cool! That's what you get by trying to be cool and acting like a gangster but acutal not.
I have seem some of these young girls or ladies with some group either gangs or nor, seem like they getting well with them too. If they think of not loosing their virginity why being with a group of people. When you are that young of age, why not scare they going to rape you somehow there will be something bad happened if you kept with them.

I"m talking about those ladies that never listen to their parents saying or borthers, uncles, cousin. Parents are the one that been through so many things and they scared that stuffs like that might happen to their love one that's why they trying hard to teach their kids to be a good girl or boy. But it's lack of helping them since they don't even care....and what they say "these days is american way not the oldies style, I don't care!!!". Always acting smarter than their parents or anyone that telling them. At the end, they will get what they want. I meant they probably want to have fun, but being with a group of gangster gang that's what you get "force to have sex". FUN = RAPe = SEX = Die for Love (That's what I describe fun for those young ladies).

Your friends (not all friends) is your hiding enemy!!! They hide from you most of the time. Just like the (good) girl's her friend (bad) lied to her for go out and have fun. Her friend knew that she's already being rape so why not let her other friends have its too. That's why come into a situation like that....the friendship has to be say in order for the good girl to go with them and get rape. That's where you got to decide, do you really want to be with friend her????? You either break up your friendship and not go or keep the friendship and go have fun with them. Your choice, the future is you not someone else!

That's why old people always saying being with friend with the goodie not the bagger. Since this is american style, young people want to be cool so they don't want to be friend with the goodie and that's what they get for trying to be cool.
Especialy these young people, their brain is heartsoft and it's easy to get them into trick. I suggest from now on, these young ladies age should listen to their parents not just acting the way they want to be cool and have fun. It's not fun with being good girl, but if you really think about it, all the fun will start.

For case like these, sometimes it's the parents' fault for working to hard and never have time with their kids. Always work and work, let the kids stay home and told them to be good so they did. However, when outside everything changed since they never experienced the outter world so when they met some strange people, they don't know and got into their trap. These is what I called being "TOO GOODIE" worst will happen to you. Being "TOO BAGGER" bad thing will happen too. Best is to stay in between, learn from others, news (like here), open your ears to other common, listen to your parents because they are the one that care for you the most not your lover. Being friend with the people you know history, attitude, behaviors, etc. Use your own judgement from a YES or NO decision. If they don't like your attitude why being with them anwayz. Get to the people you know care for you not just want you. Don't just look for handsome guy (Sorry guys, i'm a guy too but I got to be honest), sometimes they are the one that trap you into trouble that will rude your life forever!!! Looks can trap people into trouble. Remember GOD gave you love as a gift and save for the one, who you really want to be with forever in lifetime and it's not use for playing to have fun, once being used everything changed, never be the same again!!!

I hope from today on, everyone change their attitude and start listen to their parents not just do whatever you want. Just don't use the word " I DON'T CARE" then you'll be fine.

For those peeps that rape young age girls, law enforcement will get them some days. Beside, GOD will punish them....someday they will regret!!!!

The past is experience, the future is unpreditable, live your life to the fullest and learn from others, use your judgement!!!


"The major key to your better future is YOU."

 

[sunflower]

No, I read your post in its entirety and then just now once again and I still have the same impression that your are very bias towards the girls.

I have no bias towards you or anyone else in this forum, I just think maybe you should state it more clearly because if I interpreted this way I'm sure others may too and its a bad thing for girls to read and feel if they know of someone or even themselves who have been raped.  They'll think even the whole world not just their community is blaming them.

[post="35323"][/post]​

you read my whole post? and you still got the impression that i was blaming the girls for what happened? WOW, I am shocked myself, sorry my 14 years of living in America didn't improve my English.

let me try to explain to those that got confused...

the first paragraph was the closest that i've came into experience with a rape victim, well that i know in person.

the second paragraph and third paragraph was summarizing what happened and how the girls could of had prevented what happened to them from happening.

fourth paragraph i was stating that those rapist should burn in hell for raping and prostituting a 12 or any age girl. oh and kinda trying to back anti-hmong up on why she is posting this in the hmong section and why she is only focusing on hmong girls.

fifth paragraph i was again trying to guess why these girls might not want to tell their parents or the authorites about their situation. and a little personal note of what i would do if i was in her shoes, basically killing my rapist.


and the last paragraph.. is me really trying to persuade girls and woman at any age to tell the authorities, so that those bastards came be put in jail...

overall, i didn't find my response in anyway saying that i 'blamed' those victims for being raped. i was only stating how to prevent it in the second and third paragraph, no intentions of saying they are to be blamed. again, sorry if my grammars are not correct. i am only a poor college student who is working in a hospital as a unit coordinator to support myself so i might not have enough knowledge to see what you see wrong with my response.

 

[anti-hmong]

No, I read your post in its entirety and then just now once again and I still have the same impression that your are very bias towards the girls.

I have no bias towards you or anyone else in this forum, I just think maybe you should state it more clearly because if I interpreted this way I'm sure others may too and its a bad thing for girls to read and feel if they know of someone or even themselves who have been raped. They'll think even the whole world not just their community is blaming them.

[post="35323"][/post]​

maybe u're just not reading what sunflower was really posting...you're just reading what you want to read...from reading her post i didn't get the impression that she was being biased...in fact...i think she was being more than fair...and she had some great points in her post...it wasn't about bashing anyone or anything

 

[ceda_lee]

Everyone interprets and analyzes things differently...explains why we all have very different views...I think this is what is going on...you think you're right...I think I'm right...when you initially think one way already, it's gonna be hard to persuave you to agree with someone else...

 

[azngurlo07]

yeah it sucks for those girls but its pretty stupid of them to think they can go hang out with guys like that in the first place.. if its ppl u dont know... why in the world would u go into their car. Its their own fault for getting involved. Its sad how it would be disgraceful but hey its the culture... when u grow up and have kids of ur own u can think the other way for accepting ur child from going into some random dudes car and getting raped.

And yes it sucks for them to get forced married.

 

[paxiong04]

I THINK THAT THEY WERE AT THE WRONG PLACE AND TIME... AND YEA I THINK THAT THEY PRAY ONT HE YOUNGER ONES BECASUE THEY THINK THEY CAN SPEAK UP AND MAKE A DIFFRENCE... WELL YEA THEY CAN... I THINK THAT IF I WAS IN THERE SHOES I WOULD LET THEM RAPE AND THEN AFTERWARDS REPORT IT RIGHT A WAY AN I WOULDNT CARE ABOUT MY REPUTAION BECAUSE I WANT TO HE WORLD TO NOE THAT RAPE IS WRONG AND IT DOESNT MATTER HOW OLD YOU ARE... WHAT RACE YOU ARE YOU CANT VIOLATE ANYONE IN THAT WAY... ANT TO THEM FUCKERS WHO TRICK LITTLE GIRLS TO DO THOSE THINGS FUCKEN GROW UP AND WORK FOR YOUR MONEY...

 

[daisy_changstah]

Just knowing the fact that this happens in the Hmong community is scary. Really, I never knew such things like this happened. Good thing that i don't go to parties or do any of those stuff.
True, the Hmong culture may be a bit too much sometimes. Why marry the person that rape you? If i was raped (thank God that didn't happen and hope it don't), I would NEVER want to marry that person. Why? Well, he raped me. Think of other stuff he may do....
Anyway, don't wanna think about it. I am just grateful. As for those girls, I hope they learn something and hopefully they can try to live a life without letting that experience haunt/control their future!

 

[lamour01]

Rape is not only a HMONG problem but everywhere around the world. You can almost always identify with someone else in any situation but since this is a Hmong topic, I'm going to talk about problems in the Hmong community. Before you read what I wrote, I just want to make sure that you don't think that I think this is only happening in the Hmong community.

No one deserves to get raped, no matter if they didn't listen to their parents, or dress slutty, or all other factors. Sure, they did make themselves vulnerable but is that a reason to get raped??? Those of you who said that these girls DESERVED to get raped make me furious! What if your child gets raped then??? Does she deserve it like these girls did? Are you not going to stand by her??? Those of you who said the girls got what they asked for should really think about it. Rape is a heinous crime and no one should have to go through with it.

These girls are not STUPID. I think you may have forgotten what it feels like to be at that age. At that age, it's very confusing. You are not a child anymore but you're not a teenager yet. It's an awkward age to be at. I was at that age once. Like these girls, my parents wouldn't let me hang out with my friends or go to the movies and such. I could only go with my close blood cousins but not any of my friends, not even Hmong friends. All I could think was that they didn't want me to have any fun in my life except stay home. I never disobeyed my parents and went out behind their back because I wasn't a rebellious child. Maybe these girls were and that's why they did what they did. If their parents were much more clearer in their intent on their strictness and that they just love their children and don't want them to get hurt, maybe the girls wouldn't have gone out and such but we all know that Hmong parents (especially the older generation) are not known for their being able to express their love. At 12, I didn't know that my parents loved me. They never hugged me or gave me a compliments or said they loved me. It was when I got older that I realized they did love me. That's why they raised me up and have put such strict limitations on me. They loved me in their own way and as a child, I couldn't see that. These girls wouldn't be able to see it either.

These girls are just children. And children don't think. We are older than them so we know how to think but at that age, they don't really think. They can only think and live in the present and not about how their actions would affect the future. Of course, I'm not saying it's ALL children but most children. One of the girl went with a bunch of strangers because she was peer-pressured by her friend. Yes, I agree. She should have thought twice about it and not have gone in the car with the guys but maybe that was her best friend and she didn't want to lose her.

Some of you have said that these girls don't come out and tell that they were raped because they use the Hmong culture as an excuse. If that's what you claim, then all reasons are just excuses. The Hmong culture still favors the patriarchal society. Women are just the dirt beneath men's feet. If a girl was raped and then she reported it and the Hmong community found out, she would be termed as a SLUT. Even if they knew it was gang members, they won't care. They are still going to lash out at the girl for being stupid and a slut. Maybe a few Hmong parents aren't like that but most are. They are supposed to comfor their daughter in that situation but instead, the yell at her. How do you think you would feel if you were in that situation? Will you be able to accept it? And it's not only from your family but the Hmong community. We can all so easily say that we don't care what others think and that we should report a rape case immediately but that's because we haven't been through that situation before. Words are easily said but harder to prove.

These girls know that if they speak up about being raped, they will be termed as a whore so they do what they think is best: keep quiet. They don't want to face their problems and put the bastards in jail but they have reason. When they speak out, no one will support them and then, they will especially be left with nothing. Their family would probably disown them or not acknowledge them and that they are VICTIMS. I'm pretty sure that's the one of the main reasons why they won't speak out. There are probably plenty of other reasons why they keep quiet but the Hmong culture is a main reason why they are silent. The Hmong culture IS a reason, NOT an excuse.

A few of you claimed that these girls should stand up for themselves but if they do, they will be termed as a B*TCH. Hmong girls are supposed to be meek and docile to everyone around them. I'm not that kind of girl so whenever I talk back to my parents about it I get a long lecture about how whenever I marry, my husband is going to send me back in three days and a lot of ther details that I'm not going to discuss right now. A girl is supposed to do whatever she is asked to do without any questions or complaints. As I have said earlier, Hmong people favor men over women. Why is it that when a man loses his virginity before he gets married is nothing but if a girl does, she is a slut??? Why is it that when a man cheats, he isn't berated and called a whore but that he is just having some HARMLESS fun but when a women cheats, all fingers point at her and scream, "WHORE! WHORE! WHORE!"????

Before Hmong girls can stand up for themselves, the Hmong community needs to be more supportive. They need to open up their eyes a bit. Until then, most raped Hmong girls will be silent. Like I have said before, the Hmong culture is not the only reason Hmong girls keep quiet but one of the main reasons. If Hmong people become more supportive, not all girls will report a rape but more girls will because maybe their family will stand beside them through the thunderstorm instead of running away and leaving their child alone.



This reply was from my own opinion and beliefs. I did not mean to criticize any of directly but just your ideas. If you felt like I was attacking you as a person, then I apologize.

 

[HuabNag]

Women are gradually rising but according to society, men still have the upper hand...society favors men in so many ways...both visible and invisible...I think this also plays a role in how girls react to certain situations...

[post="26372"][/post]​

I agreed, this is not just Hmong girls. Other race also have the same problem too, women tends not to report because of many other reasons. also like ceda says, society men usually have upper hand.

 

[HuabNag]

i think woman in general should get over this whole perfect image thing... the world is not perfect, and NO ONE is perfect... so if something bad happens to you, by all means report it! if you don't they will think that all woman are like this and keep on going without thinking that it's wrong... or maybe they know that it's wrong but think that woman are just too scared or weak and won't report it... or can't do anything to them just because of the culture... well guess what? this is AMERICA! here, if a girl is sexually assaulted before the age of 18.. that bastard is gonna be put in jail! and even if you are over the age of 18, and you were raped or sexually insulted you can put those bastards in jail! so forget what cultures you are from and the rules that hold you back from getting justice and tell your school teachers or counselors... or call the cops and put those idiotic bastards in jail!

[post="33161"][/post]​

I totally agree with you on that sunflower. Women should come out and stand up for themselves or fight for justice. The law is there, we just need to learn how to use and make it affects.

 

[slee00]

A RAPE is A RAPE! Men have no business violeting these girls no matter what state they are...If they were not willing and being forced or threaten to be used for sex....these men deserved to be locked up for it!

 

[ceda_lee]

Ok...I agree that these men have no right to violate these girls like this...but according to Sunflower (in which I totally agree with)...these girls also have a part in it too...I'm not saying that just cause they were out their drinking and doing drugs, then they deserve what they got...I'm saying this is a lesson for them to learn...I'm sure all parents lecture their kids, but some just have to learn the hard way...

 

[KhoOnxNouxWanxJai]

Yikes hmMm tough subject, but from what I read on the article the 12 year old girl wasn't exactly trying to act gangster or anything she wounded up with the wrong group of people and I'm sure thats not her fault and for other reasons no matter how a person act or etc.. its not an invitation to be violated by anyone...If you think about it just because a girl dresses a certain way people automatically thinks shes the "s" word, but in reality she could be a really intelligent girl... and others tend to think that open doors for them to invade the girls personal sense of security.... So there is no excuse for ever touching a girl no means NO! not matter what she looks like or what she acts like if she says no you boys better zip up your pants and walk the other way....And also one more thing umMmM lets see younger girls tend to lack maturity on some part so its not fair to say that they should've known better than to do this and that because in a sense they couldn't have possibly think that something like that could happen to them... I mean if girls walked around everyday fearing and being cautious of every stranger then this world wouldn't be such a good place would it.........

o0o0 sorry I probably don't even make sense in what I was trying to say, but to summon up everything I said ....

There is never an excuse to force yourself on another girl and once she says no then any sexual contact should have stopped at that point

 

[hnub_khaab]

Rape is not only a HMONG problem but everywhere around the world. You can almost always identify with someone else in any situation but since this is a Hmong topic, I'm going to talk about problems in the Hmong community. Before you read what I wrote, I just want to make sure that you don't think that I think this is only happening in the Hmong community.

No one deserves to get raped, no matter if they didn't listen to their parents, or dress slutty, or all other factors. Sure, they did make themselves vulnerable but is that a reason to get raped??? Those of you who said that these girls DESERVED to get raped make me furious! What if your child gets raped then??? Does she deserve it like these girls did? Are you not going to stand by her??? Those of you who said the girls got what they asked for should really think about it. Rape is a heinous crime and no one should have to go through with it.

These girls are not STUPID. I think you may have forgotten what it feels like to be at that age. At that age, it's very confusing. You are not a child anymore but you're not a teenager yet. It's an awkward age to be at. I was at that age once. Like these girls, my parents wouldn't let me hang out with my friends or go to the movies and such. I could only go with my close blood cousins but not any of my friends, not even Hmong friends. All I could think was that they didn't want me to have any fun in my life except stay home. I never disobeyed my parents and went out behind their back because I wasn't a rebellious child. Maybe these girls were and that's why they did what they did. If their parents were much more clearer in their intent on their strictness and that they just love their children and don't want them to get hurt, maybe the girls wouldn't have gone out and such but we all know that Hmong parents (especially the older generation) are not known for their being able to express their love. At 12, I didn't know that my parents loved me. They never hugged me or gave me a compliments or said they loved me. It was when I got older that I realized they did love me. That's why they raised me up and have put such strict limitations on me. They loved me in their own way and as a child, I couldn't see that. These girls wouldn't be able to see it either.

These girls are just children. And children don't think. We are older than them so we know how to think but at that age, they don't really think. They can only think and live in the present and not about how their actions would affect the future. Of course, I'm not saying it's ALL children but most children. One of the girl went with a bunch of strangers because she was peer-pressured by her friend. Yes, I agree. She should have thought twice about it and not have gone in the car with the guys but maybe that was her best friend and she didn't want to lose her.

Some of you have said that these girls don't come out and tell that they were raped because they use the Hmong culture as an excuse. If that's what you claim, then all reasons are just excuses. The Hmong culture still favors the patriarchal society. Women are just the dirt beneath men's feet. If a girl was raped and then she reported it and the Hmong community found out, she would be termed as a SLUT. Even if they knew it was gang members, they won't care. They are still going to lash out at the girl for being stupid and a slut. Maybe a few Hmong parents aren't like that but most are. They are supposed to comfor their daughter in that situation but instead, the yell at her. How do you think you would feel if you were in that situation? Will you be able to accept it? And it's not only from your family but the Hmong community. We can all so easily say that we don't care what others think and that we should report a rape case immediately but that's because we haven't been through that situation before. Words are easily said but harder to prove.

These girls know that if they speak up about being raped, they will be termed as a whore so they do what they think is best: keep quiet. They don't want to face their problems and put the bastards in jail but they have reason. When they speak out, no one will support them and then, they will especially be left with nothing. Their family would probably disown them or not acknowledge them and that they are VICTIMS. I'm pretty sure that's the one of the main reasons why they won't speak out. There are probably plenty of other reasons why they keep quiet but the Hmong culture is a main reason why they are silent. The Hmong culture IS a reason, NOT an excuse.

A few of you claimed that these girls should stand up for themselves but if they do, they will be termed as a B*TCH. Hmong girls are supposed to be meek and docile to everyone around them. I'm not that kind of girl so whenever I talk back to my parents about it I get a long lecture about how whenever I marry, my husband is going to send me back in three days and a lot of ther details that I'm not going to discuss right now. A girl is supposed to do whatever she is asked to do without any questions or complaints. As I have said earlier, Hmong people favor men over women. Why is it that when a man loses his virginity before he gets married is nothing but if a girl does, she is a slut??? Why is it that when a man cheats, he isn't berated and called a whore but that he is just having some HARMLESS fun but when a women cheats, all fingers point at her and scream, "WHORE! WHORE! WHORE!"????

Before Hmong girls can stand up for themselves, the Hmong community needs to be more supportive. They need to open up their eyes a bit. Until then, most raped Hmong girls will be silent. Like I have said before, the Hmong culture is not the only reason Hmong girls keep quiet but one of the main reasons. If Hmong people become more supportive, not all girls will report a rape but more girls will because maybe their family will stand beside them through the thunderstorm instead of running away and leaving their child alone.
This reply was from my own opinion and beliefs. I did not mean to criticize any of directly but just your ideas. If you felt like I was attacking you as a person, then I apologize.

[post="129575"][/post]​

I agree with you. I've worked at a Women's Center for 5 years now and there have been many cases of sexual assaults from all races and gender ranging from college students, community people and cases of children. A lot of peoples comments on here do upset me but that's okay. There are many reasons as to why many victims don't come out. One of the reasons why a lot of people don't speak out is because of fear of the attacker coming back for them and like you said, theres not a lot of support from family and friends. I have heard of parents forcing their child to marry the rapist which angers me so much. No one deserves to be sexually assaulted even if they're rebellious, doing drugs, or drinking at any age. Sexual assault not only happens to females but to males also. I believe there is a difference in having consensual sex and having it taken from you and your body violated. It's an awful and painful experience and won't teach anyone anything but leave a scar. A lot of people don't recover from it but some people do try to move on. I hope these young girls now have the support they need. I disagree that these girls solicited any part in the rape. These girls may have decided to go with the boys but they didn't ask to be raped. This should not be considered as a lesson to be taught to be a good person. Young girls are four times more likely than any other group to be a victim. Sexual assault does not only happen by a stranger but also committed by someone who is known to the victim, partner (boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife), or relative. I'm not a certified professional but I am going through a sexual assault advocacy training. I'm learning a lot and I feel that it's important for people to educate themselves on issues like sexual assault so we can help support one another instead of blaming the victims. I have close relatives and friends who were sexually assaulted and they didn't ask to be raped. I wish for pedophiles and rapists to be taken off the streets and it can be done if people speak up but because of fear a lot of them will still be out on the streets. I find it sad that these perpetrators can be someone we know.