Pretty Boy
Original one-shot by SoJu, 2009
OST: Adult Ceremony by Park Jiyoon
Down he descended, breathless and sweaty. His eyes had glazed over long ago when he downed the eighty-seventh shot of soju. His damp palms fought for grip on the liquor bottle while his temples pounded in sync with The Black Eyed Peas. Thick foul air composed of cigarettes, alcohol, and halitosis filled his lungs with each hesitant intake of breath. He dared himself to raise his head to survey the rampant Thursday night crowd.
“Fucking kids,” he muttered to himself.
But he wasn’t any better than the shrieking individuals that indulged themselves with the festive night high. His eyes flitted back to the blurred bartender that eyed him maliciously. He blew a kiss in her direction.
Hey, hot stuff.
He tottered around to find Siwon making faces at a girl.
He shoved forward, unintentionally colliding into a figure that had meant to breeze by him. He toppled over in his drunken state, atop her. He pressed her down and sought comfort in the stickiness of her chest.
He grinned sloppily.
She stared at him blankly.
“Yah…” he drooled.
The girl looked vaguely familiar. At 3AM, her hair came undone as with most of her clothes. She no longer appeared fresh and appeasing. Instead, she reeked and sweat oozed from every visible pore of her body. She was in dire need of a makeover. Whoever said girls looked hot when they’re actually hot and sweaty must’ve been high. In his slurred and incoherent state, Heechul still managed to differentiate the ugly species from the appealing ones. This girl wasn’t bad looking. Just not as good looking as he.
For what seemed two decades was actually only two minutes. The bewildered girl used up one minute to marvel at the beautiful stranger—horrendously drunk—that ran her over. And the other to decide how to react. Then it registered that he had destroyed her brand new outfit.
“Yah!” she shrilled.
Heechul’s eyes widened with sparks as he noticed the girl was referring to him. He leaned forward to press his finger against her lips as if to coax her anger. He traced the chapped lips and grinned stupidly. “You know….I’m pretty sober when I’m good looking…” He allowed his head to lower onto her shoulder, seeking solace.
But the girl wouldn’t stay still.
“You bitch! You ruined my clothes!” she cried. She shoved him away forcefully and looked up to her friends, pleading for assistance. However, Heechul’s thin arm snaked around her waist and held her down. She gaped at him in disbelief.
“Yeah, I’m sober when I’m pretty good looking,” he repeated.
When I’m sober…
When I’m sober…
I’m the shit.
But that wasn’t the case today.
Giving him one last kick, she scrambled to her feet and scurried after her friends. Heechul slammed his head down on the cold hard floor, suddenly aware of the growing audience that gathered around him. He winced at the pain that trotted through his head, then grimaced as an unsettling wave of nausea seized him. He remained rooted to the freshly muddled surface he had recently attributed to (with his incessant burps to mini vomits, and spills of his precious liquor). He planted a wobbly hand before his face and fiddled with the unknown substance that wavered with the bass that rocked the premises.
Somewhere in the back of his head, he heard somebody yell for him. At least it sounded like they were calling his name.
He narrowed his eyes.
What’s my name again?
Heechul stumbled to his feet, flinging his arms into the air.
“HEY!” he shouted angrily. “I’m really good looking when I’m sober!”
He received a standing ovation.
But it was short-lived. His arm slapped Siwon in such an aggressive manner; it silenced the stunned bystanders.
At that moment, the nameless girl stopped in her tracks and turned to him with a sneer, “Sure, pretty boy. You and the rest of the fucking world.” She flashed him her middle finger salute and stormed off into the hooting crowd.
Heechul waved after her before turning to his quiet friend. He leaned into Siwon’s frame and snorted. “You think I’m prettier, don’t you?”
Siwon nodded, feigning agreement.
Heechul squealed delightfully and reached over to give his buddy a firm pinch in the ass.
He loved being pretty.
And drunk.
Those that are curious...
Watch the following (precisely 2:00):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhug4EtzhYE
That's Siwon making faces at a girl
