Interacial Relationship

[yajvaj]

Who here is in an interacial relationship? i was just wondering because i am currently in one and it took me almost a month to tell my mom about him! i was surprise she didn't flip out when i introduce him to her after my graduation, but now she minds if i go hang out with him so each time i hang out with him i got to make up excuses that i'm with my friends, actually they're not even excuses because when i hang out with him im with my friends also. My mom don't want me or my sister to date outside our race and sometimes i understand but i feel like hmong parents think that hmong girls are only made for hmong guys and no other race! so annoying!! So i was just wondering how else should i handle this?

 

[mongstaness]

o really? wat race is ur boyfriend?

 

[mainhiathao]

i don't believe race really matters...but the truth is i'll never date a black dude...to be honest i'm scared of them...

 

[mongstaness]

i don't believe race really matters...but the truth is i'll never date a black dude...to be honest i'm scared of them...

lol...thats soo funnie! race doesn't really matter to me either, but i would jus prefer to stick to my asian or hmong girls

 

[nkaujhmooblauj]

i'm currently with a hmong guy... **sigh**
but if i was to date out of the hmong ethnicity.. i'm sticking with the asians. ehehe...
i'm not being racist.. it's just preference. ahahah

 

[yajvaj]

o really? wat race is ur boyfriend?

He's Mexican

i'm currently with a hmong guy... **sigh**
but if i was to date out of the hmong ethnicity.. i'm sticking with the asians. ehehe...
i'm not being racist.. it's just preference. ahahah

HAHA...thats what i said too when i wasn't in a relationship! but look now i'm with a Mexican!

 

[mongstaness]

lol...i have a few cousins who date mexicans...lol they say that hmong guys are not cute...so they prefer other races...but i think its becuz of their location that they don't see cute hmongs....they go to a school where there are barely any hmong people so i think thats what affected their likings...

 

[tearsofautumn]

Aww...its sweet!! I don't see any problems in dating a different race other then Hmong. It's up to you and that person....if they fit well in with you and you guys have a full understanding of each other...then its an "awesomely" thing. Yeah, i totally can relate to the whole "hmong parents thing" and "making excusses". My parents also don't buy into the whole "interacial dating" either...they don't believe in having a son-in-law who isn't hmong and can't understand what they are saying to him. As for me, i say "its not about being hmong or not...its about finding your happiness and exploring life through different eyes". Give your mom some time to adjust and adopt to him and she'll get pass it....she might not like him or welcome him in, but in time, she'll accept him.

Good luck and believe in each other and the rest will follow.

 

[nkaujhmooblauj]

He's Mexican
HAHA...thats what i said too when i wasn't in a relationship! but look now i'm with a Mexican!

usually when people say that they're not going to do something.. they do it..
but i'm ONE HUNDRED PERCENT POSITIVE
here and there i thought a few guys outside of the asians were good looking...
but i never "had the thing" for them...
i have a cousin.. she only dates mexican guys... she just likes them...
and that's perfectly fine.
everyone has their own taste and preference

 

[yingerbug]

keke! Been there done that! Sadly I dated my Native American-Mexican guy for 2 1/2 years and still never intro him to my parents. He knew my parent were really you know. Not really Racism but just dont want their children dating other nationality. But what can you say... In my family... My oldest sister is married to a white guy... My little sister is married to Chinese... Possible of a HINDU guy and HMONG guys... As for me.. *sigh* no signs at all... keke! Dont matter what... As long as their is love thats all that matters... keke!

 

[mainhiathao]

lol...thats soo funnie! race doesn't really matter to me either, but i would jus prefer to stick to my asian or hmong girls

me too...

 

[yajvaj]

Aww...its sweet!! I don't see any problems in dating a different race other then Hmong. It's up to you and that person....if they fit well in with you and you guys have a full understanding of each other...then its an "awesomely" thing. Yeah, i totally can relate to the whole "hmong parents thing" and "making excusses". My parents also don't buy into the whole "interacial dating" either...they don't believe in having a son-in-law who isn't hmong and can't understand what they are saying to him. As for me, i say "its not about being hmong or not...its about finding your happiness and exploring life through different eyes". Give your mom some time to adjust and adopt to him and she'll get pass it....she might not like him or welcome him in, but in time, she'll accept him.

Good luck and believe in each other and the rest will follow.

Thanks! yea i think i just need to give her more time than she'll accept him. Thank You!

 

[pink_juliet_kashie]

i didn't read anyone else comment..so if i repeat someting sorrie.there was actually a thread i started a while back...anyways...i'm not involve with one rite now..but i did once...but it wasn't tat serious so i regret getting on my mom and dad's bad side but everyone's is different...

all i reallie gotta say is i know..and i know you know it shouldn't be wrong to date someone outside of the race..we're all equal rite?...but you and I also both know most of our family cannot accept another race...so you should reallie ask yourself before upsetting anyone...ask yourself how serious this relationship is..and where do you see the two of you in the future...and if you are willing to take that risk of upsetting your family...esp. your parent...because once u do something you can't take it back. I will tell you Hmong ppl will talk, they will stare, whisper and maybe even point finger whether you see them or not...so again ask yourself if you're up for it. And remember it's not just your reputation at stake but also your parents...i tink tat's one of the biggest one to think about...they are your parents and what you do will reflect on them...honestly i'm not sure if you experince any of this yet...and this might sound like i'm exaggerating..but i'm reallie being truthful...and other ppl in interracial relationship have told me they've experince this as well...for me..i don't like the idea of juz keep going out with him until your parents stops complaining...in my opinion that is the point where they've alreadie said all of what they wanted to say..and they just don't care any more..and i reallie don't like the idea of that...it's a hard subject for the hmong ppl..sigh...

 

[cecilia]

**looks like i'm stalking you, but i' m not. i'm just running out of thread to post in
anyway, i totally agree, see the far future before you take that high jump. if your family is very traditional and strict, it's harder for them to accept as they value their pride and reputation more than anything. that's what's important about the Hmong ppl. if you think the relationship will last til death do us part, then GO FOR IT !!! or if you're willing to accept what consequences you may encounter, then go for it. but if you think it's cool, you just want to do it once, i say, not worth it. words and gossips among the ppl fly faster than a fly. the next thing you found out from someone badmouthing you, the other state already known half way. Lol ..

i wouldn't mind having a interacial relationship too but laying out the consequences, i'm afraid to take it. alot of ppl will be hurt by what i do - better if i wait until i'm ready, ready. lol

 

[mongstaness]

i think that the only downfall for datin a person outside ur race, is if u get married and get divorced....(u kno how if hmong couples get divorced, n then words spread n a whole buncha guys r after u?)..well it wont be the same if u were married n divorced with someone not hmong...cuz from what i heard is that hmong parents n people would consider u dirty...(girls in general not guys, which i think is kinda sexism)...

ALSO, im not talking about u...i was just giving an example...

 

[cecilia]

^that's true. .. keep in mind, you will have eyes everywhere you set foot on

 

[pink_juliet_kashie]

**looks like i'm stalking you, but i' m not. i'm just running out of thread to post in
anyway, i totally agree, see the far future before you take that high jump. if your family is very traditional and strict, it's harder for them to accept as they value their pride and reputation more than anything. that's what's important about the Hmong ppl. if you think the relationship will last til death do us part, then GO FOR IT !!! or if you're willing to accept what consequences you may encounter, then go for it. but if you think it's cool, you just want to do it once, i say, not worth it. words and gossips among the ppl fly faster than a fly. the next thing you found out from someone badmouthing you, the other state already known half way. Lol ..

i wouldn't mind having a interacial relationship too but laying out the consequences, i'm afraid to take it. alot of ppl will be hurt by what i do - better if i wait until i'm ready, ready. lol

it's okay cecilia u dun have to make up excuses...i dun mind u following me around...

good job... just repeated wat i said but in more educated way with better diction...lol -_-

 

[yajvaj]

i didn't read anyone else comment..so if i repeat someting sorrie.there was actually a thread i started a while back...anyways...i'm not involve with one rite now..but i did once...but it wasn't tat serious so i regret getting on my mom and dad's bad side but everyone's is different...

all i reallie gotta say is i know..and i know you know it shouldn't be wrong to date someone outside of the race..we're all equal rite?...but you and I also both know most of our family cannot accept another race...so you should reallie ask yourself before upsetting anyone...ask yourself how serious this relationship is..and where do you see the two of you in the future...and if you are willing to take that risk of upsetting your family...esp. your parent...because once u do something you can't take it back. I will tell you Hmong ppl will talk, they will stare, whisper and maybe even point finger whether you see them or not...so again ask yourself if you're up for it. And remember it's not just your reputation at stake but also your parents...i tink tat's one of the biggest one to think about...they are your parents and what you do will reflect on them...honestly i'm not sure if you experince any of this yet...and this might sound like i'm exaggerating..but i'm reallie being truthful...and other ppl in interracial relationship have told me they've experince this as well...for me..i don't like the idea of juz keep going out with him until your parents stops complaining...in my opinion that is the point where they've alreadie said all of what they wanted to say..and they just don't care any more..and i reallie don't like the idea of that...it's a hard subject for the hmong ppl..sigh...

yea that is true too! thank you!!

 

[samkob]

I'm actually dating a WHITE guy from now.. and *sighs* i'M pretty aware of all the consequences out there within our Hmong people but the thing is.. i dont like him just to look cool.. i like him because i just do and he's attracted to me as well.. So.. yeah, i already told my mom about him and my mom is kinda against it but she said watever i do i should really think about it.. and I listen to her, but idk.. right now all i care is that he likes me and i do like him too

 

[tavang]

apparently our parents will always be against it. now and days these folks still care a lot about their names. but hey its our life so why not pick who we like. don't wanna make a mistake. all im saying is if u really like him/her and they really like you then go for it. don't back down cuz of your parents. they'll always be against them no matter what. even if they're hmong, some parents still don't like them. they can't stop u from liking who u wanna like. SO, its ur life so u make the best of it.