He stole my heart...

[ntxhais]

So there's this man...Ever since I met hime about a year ago I've got the biggest crush on him.
It hurts a little to be in this position, I guess I've realized the meaning of having a crush on someone, painful, crushing me day after day...

It's not that I'm really young, teenage anymore, I'm in my twenties, is it still healthy to be in this kind of situation...?

If you have a crush on someone but you know they would never go out with you because they are way out of your league would you still tell the person how you felt and deal with the rejection or would you keep your feelings to yourself and continue to crush

 

[ChenrukNote]

Wow you have a crush on this dude for about a year? That's a long time lol. A couple questions to ask before deciding to tell him or not that I have to ask of you is

1) Is he single?
2) Does he know you exist?

If the answer to both of the questions is yes then I say go for it! You never know what he feels unless you straight out ask him. Plus, why continue to torment yourself? You remind me of my little teenage sister. She calls me with her relationship problems because there's this dude that she used to like but when they entered high school he decided to spend freshman year at a different high school than her but now he's back at the same high school and acting as though she's the love of his life, and she's confused as to whether she should ask him what he feels or just let it slide. I told her to ask and if he hesitates for awhile then you know he doesn't like you that way so to save your face, say "I meant do you like me as a friend you idiot!" LOL.

I have a crush on my hot orientation leader i met at my college orientation too but it has only been a couple of months and we don't know eachother well enough or talk to eachother often enough for me to take a chance. Heck I only talked to the dude for 3 days during the entire orientation haha. Oh but he did invite me to an event that I had to sadly decline because of a conflict in schedule *sniff sniff*. Ever since then I hear nothing from him so sad. But it's all good, there's plenty of fishes in the sea I just have to be the shark that catches one of them (Char I'm using your words lol).

 

[ntxhais]

1.) I don't think he's single...last semester during guitar lesson his phone rang and he mentioned that he has to take the call because it might be his girlfriend. So, I'm thinking that he's still with her.

2.) I'm pretty sure he knows that I exist. He's my guitar teacher, we have private lessons for half an hour everyweek. I've been taking lessons for about a year now. (That's my definition about having a crush on him for about a year) but I don't know if he knows that I'm a little coo coo head for him...

I guess by telling him, I'm being a scardy cat and just emailing him our last semester together so that If, which I probably will, get turn down, we won't have to meet each other any more any way.... *sighs* dunno... I still have to take 2 more semesters....

 

[rakcharm]

well since you are so sure you'll get turn down then save yourself the embarassment. plus if he's not single then there's no point in pursuing him. eh..there's other guys out there. my advice for you is take a class with a diff teacher if you think you can't handle being around him. it'll make you forget him. or else just deal with it. i mean for a year already, if he had any interest he'll at least show something. i think that will help you decide whether to tell him or not.

but it looks like you want to tell him. do whatever you want but just remember if worst comes to worst you might regret taking that action and say to yourself,"if only i didn't do that."

 

[ChenrukNote]

Well girl if he's not single, I will never advise you to chase after him. I can't stand others that break up a happy home for their own selfishness because I have a close friend who's family was destroyed due to a third wheel and I love his mom like my own mom so to see that much pain inflicted on her was heart wrenching. We're girls alike so never do to another girl, something you will not like done to you. So like rakcharm says, in order to save yourself the embarrassment of being turned down because he has a girlfriend already then don't go for it. Be strong and remember there are plenty more in the sea! No man is worth losing your woman dignity for in my opinion.

Alright enough with distractions i need to finish my works cited page for soc lol.

 

[ntxhais]

Thank You for the advice. I just really needed the third opinion, because for the past couple of days I feel like there's two part of me, sort of like the evil me and and angel me, telling me to go for it, and telling me how ridiculous I am for falling for this guy.....Hmmmm.... I better just keep it to myself.

 

[7270]

always keep your options open so that you don't fall for anyone unreasonably. hang out and see many people. who you thought was "the one" will quickly become "what the heck did i see in him?" seriously, there will be a time, when you say this. you'll try really hard to remember, & you'll eventually conclude that someone probably slipped some cocaine into your drink one day.

if he isn't single, whether he knows you're alive or not, doesn't matter. you just don't go there. plus, why would you like a guy who will leave his committed relationship for you. he's not loyal, & he'll do the same to you. or they may have broken up by now, you'll have to find out by getting to know what he does outside of the lessons. ask him about his hobbies. most people will mention their significant other. i really don't know of anyone who doesn't slide in their significant other into the conversation, when you're talking about their hobbies and such.

i'm not very much into telling people about how you feel. it sounds too needy and clingy... always appears that way to me. action is better. if he's single, ask the dude to hang out sometime. go do something fun together. movie/dinner sucks. i generally am not into telling about feelings until you want to become exclusive.

 

[noungning]

not hard at all, since he is committed. move on...

u're not wrong for having feelings for the person. emotions are hard to control, and sometimes it just goes too much with the flow that you feel as if you have no control over yourself. having a crush is good for you, at least it tells you that you are still normal and can like someone lol. but if u are aware of the fact that he is committed to a relationship, that's when u have to step back and part.

and like # guy says, u will eventually look back one day and say shit wth did i see in that guy, he was such a geek. lmfao.

but i gotta say, i had a crush on a classmate, he was so tall, hot, and sizzling...even drove a fabulous car. it's ok to dream, drool a little, then wake up to reality lol...

 

[lady_sati]

im sooooo sad.
tears are in my eyes
'does he know you exist?'
that question made me sad

but i do agree, we have to move on.
clingy on to what can be, when we see it before our eyes,
it's not healthy for us to linger.

it's a lesson to make us stronger.

good luck!
you can do it!!!

 

[ntxhais]

Wow, it's been a while since I wrote this! I hope my identity is not revealed and if it is, they all know about it by now I think. At least the people who are on here. I guess I owe you gals a little update. I'm finishing up my fourth semester with him, that's 2 years with this guy! And I couldn't change guitar teachers, because he's the only one at our school. But I've come painfully to an acceptance that I was just dreaming for these past two years. His girlfriend that he was slightly mentioned has now turned into his fiance. He didn't tell me intentionally, just slipped his mouth, because he is really private about his private life.

Well, there goes one chapter in my life. Time to end the chapter and start a new one. Only three more lessons and then I'm done, which brings both happy and sad feelings.

 

[7270]

agh. goodluck kiddo.

yes. i know you are in your 20s. it's fun to say kiddo regardless.